Posted in Daily post, True Story, Inspirational

What Happened to MH370?

mh370

8th March 2014, Malaysian Airlines flight MH370 just disappeared with all it’s passengers and crew.  Just disappeared into thin air.  The first day was chaotic. Families left behind were angry and sad.  They demanded answers and weren’t prepared to accept that a plane could just disappear.  Who could.  Days became weeks and now their hopes of recovering the bodies were disappearing too.  After nearly four years of search by different organisations, now the search is going to finally end.

I feel for the families who are struggling to move on.  Not just for those who perished on MH370.  But for all those families who have lost a family member because they’ve gone missing.  Parents of kids who have been kidnapped.  They have to not only deal with the grief of losing the loved one but also the added agony of not knowing what really happened.

Rivulets of tears almost drowning the flicker of hope but somehow they muster another day to wait in hope.

Taxes and death are the only sure thing they say.  It’s not just about accepting the death that is hard in this scenario.  But it is when, whom and how that makes it harder.

I am pretty sure they have said enough prayers and don’t need mine.  And it’s not like god was waiting for that last prayer from me to reunite these sad souls.  But other than a prayer I have nothing else to offer.

 

 

 

https://dailypost.wordpress.com/prompts/disappear/

https://dailypost.wordpress.com/prompts/thin/

https://dailypost.wordpress.com/prompts/rivulet/

 

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Posted in Daily post, True Story, Inspirational

I could have done more…

sad boy

It’s been a few years, at least  more than five years, but that little face is stuck in my head.  I still wonder what happened to him, did his life get any better? where is he? how did he turn out to be? I fear to find out the answer.

It was Christmas Eve and all the medical centers were closed other than just this one on Old Port Road.  Not sure what was the emergency, but Arj needed to see a doctor and we decided to take the plunge and go there.  You don’t need an appointment at this medical center, hence it’s always overflowing with patients.  We had no choice but to endure the wait and be there.

Next to us was a mother with a toddler in her hand and an older son.  I think he would have been around five or six years old.  The boy was bored and was showing signs of it.  The mother reprimanded him for that.  Although I could empathize with the boy (as a mum of two boys myself), I understood the mothers role.  Memories of dragging my two when they were that age came to mind and didn’t envy the mother at all.

As time passed, we noticed that, she was playing with toddler, hugging and kissing the toddler, it was all about the toddler.  Each time the little boy would come to join in, she would push him away.

I was feeling very uncomfortable with this scene.  She started to talk very loudly, and would blame the boy for infecting the toddler.  As per her she had asked him not to kiss the baby and he still did it and now since the baby is sick he has to put up with being at the surgery.  Such conversations happened a few times.

Now it was getting dark and late.  Well past dinner time.  So he asked if he could get a few coins to buy a snack from the snack machine.  For which she gave the same line “no, it is because of you that we are here…” Unfortunately the snack machine is not in that building, it’s the next building otherwise I would have just bought a few snacks and given it to him and Arj and pretended that I was just sharing.

I was planning many things in my head. I was thinking maybe I could loudly announce to my son “Arj here” and hand him some money “go and grab some snacks, take him too (pointing to that boy)looks like he is hungry, not safe for him to go on his own” etc.  I was thinking of asking Arj secretly to find out the boys name and which school he attends while they are going for the snacks.  So I could inform the school and ask them to keep an eye on this kid.  In my eyes this was a horrible type of child abuse.  Mental abuse.

While I was debating what to do, she threw some money at him.  And it fell under the chairs.  He excitedly crawled under the seat and got the money.  It was only two 5c coins.  He innocently asked “can I go mum to buy something”.  She started to laugh at him “you silly, it’s only 10c’s, you can’t buy anything for that”.  The poor kid started to cry.  I wanted to join him.

Just then our doctor emerged and called us in. Uncomfortably I headed to the doctors.  I wanted to say something to the doctors. But I didn’t.  Do you think I feel guilty? More than you can imagine.  Maybe I didn’t want to blame another mother without knowing what was really the circumstance.  I don’t know why but no words came out.

When we came out they had gone into the doctors.  Arj could see I was rather distraught.  He kept assuring me that there was nothing I could have done.  Coming closer to home I got an idea.  I hurriedly got home.  Nearing Christmas I had many chocolate boxes in my cupboard. With the excuse of Christmas I could give him one.  So I grabbed the box of chocolate and ran back to the medical center.

I ran upstairs to the waiting area and like I feared, they were not there.  I went up to the receptionist and explained that I know due patient confidentiality and all that she can’t really tell me much, but I was only wanting to give a box of chocolate to a little boy.  I described the mum and two kids sitting next to me and asked if they had come out of the doctors room, have they left etc.  She said  ” I can’t say much, and it’s not me saying it but if it was me, I would look near the toilets downstairs”.

I ran back down stairs again.  I had missed them.  I looked around the car park.  They were no where to be seen.  I knew I couldn’t change his life by giving him a box of chocolate.  But I wanted him to feel loved at least by a stranger.  Just to see a glimpse of smile on his face at least just for once.

I don’t know why that mother behaved that way.  I don’t know if that was her step son or her own son.  I understand the pressures of having a toddler and another child.  I have been there when Arj was really sick and I spent months in Hospital with him.  I felt so guilty and felt that I was neglecting my eldest.  I probably did.

No amount of hugs from hubby could wipe off the guilt I felt.  Even to this day his face haunts me.  I just hope that mother got some help.  I just hope that was just one bad day for that boy and not his destiny.  I just hope things didn’t get worse for him.

That is one regret that I don’t wan’t to ever repeat again.

 

 

 

 

 

Daily word Prompt Guilty:   https://dailypost.wordpress.com/prompts/guilty/

 

Posted in Daily post, True Story, Inspirational

Putting his foot in it… Awkward

My Beloved turns Sixty tomorrow.

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So I thought it is only fitting that I talk about some of his monumental “putting his foot in it” moments.  Not that he is the one who feels embarrassed or awkward, I am usually the one left to cover up the situation.

I could write a book about these incidents but unfortunately some of them might be far too politically incorrect.  Almost all of them are politically incorrect but if I avoid them I won’t have anything to write about.

Before you judge him, yes he is politically completely incorrect.  However, he has the most amazing heart.  He will help anyone with any colour, race or religion, but don’t ask him to recite Baa Baa rainbow sheep.

Here we go, with one of the gems.

We had been invited to another Aus/Sri Lankan family for dinner.  There were many people there and we didn’t know many of them. That has never been a deterrent for my husband to completely take over the conversation.  While he was holding the fort in the lounge room I went into the kitchen to help the host.  Suddenly the host rushed in and frantically starts to talk to me.

She goes “Uma, you need to hurry, your husband, he is talking about religion(anti)”, and she points to a couple and says, “they are very strong Christians, you need to make him stop”, I tried to get his attention without raising others attention, but to no avail.  The man was very impressed with his audience and he wasn’t going to give up the floor any time soon.  The said couple kept quiet and didn’t voice their opinion or objection.  The long night finally ended.  And each guest was now finally leaving one by one.  We were about to leave and my husband notices ‘The couple’ waiting.  They make eye contact and they answered to a question we never asked “we are not from Sydney, we are just about to call for a cab”.

All night, I have been trying very hard to avoid them and to keep my husband away from them as well.  But alas, my husband asks them where they were staying and announces that it in fact, that place was on our way and would love to offer them a lift.  My heart just sank.  I have no idea why but the couple accepted the offer.  It was a long awkward drive back home.

The above is the politically corrected version.

 

 

 

 

https://dailypost.wordpress.com/prompts/awkward/

 

Posted in Daily post

Waiting ….

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I miss mum

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What’s taking her so long?

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Hang on! Is that mum’s car?

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Yes I think so.  Finally.


 

Waiting…

Waiting is part excitement and part anguish. The part anguish is made up of plethora of sub emotions.  Anguish divvies into several heads like the Hindu Gods.  Boredom, impatience and then progresses to annoyance, irritation and finally escalates to panic.  Usually does a full circle and completes with relief and sometimes unfortunately disappointment.

This was my great epiphany while waiting for my mum at the airport.

Mum was returning after her three month holiday overseas.  I cooked, shopped and stocked her fridge yesterday.  Set my alarm up for an early start.  Tossed and turned all night, worrying if I may miss the alarm.  Woke up earlier than the alarm and thought it was for the best.  But still the daily chores got in the way of being early at the airport.

As per ‘Murphy’s Law’ every slow driver and every red light was my companion for the drive.  After circling three times, I finally manage to park my car.  I was just hoping that for my sake that either there was a delay in baggage collection or at customs and that mum wasn’t waiting anxiously for me.

I glance at the flight status board as I rush in.  Good, the flight has not landed.  I contemplate grabbing a coffee, I didn’t want to part with the money just as mum exited those doors.  I decided on having that coffee after all.  Made the request for a short macchiatto, just in case I didn’t have enough time to finish a larger coffee.  Perched myself on the bar stool that had the direct view of the arrivals.  Even though I was running late, I still came prepared with my little ‘mini tab’ to do some writing.  Just in case.

By this time it was half an hour passed arrival time.  Flight status remained the same.  Another fifteen minutes passes.  Under the guise of writing my emotions were getting the better of me.  I skipped boredom.  Patience – I wasn’t impatient waiting but the airport arrivals website was definitely testing my patience.  

As per the website there was no mention of the aircraft.  This website is supposed to show all flights that was meant to arrive on that day and their flight status.  Frustrated,  I decided to check the Malaysian airlines website.  It stated that the plane had departed Malaysia.  And that’s all.  No mention of delayed or approximate time of arrival.  I gave another ten minutes and checked the two websites again.  Same messages.  On Adelaide airport’s website there was no mention or acknowledgement of the aircraft and Malaysian Airlines just says that it departed.

My mind was refusing to come out of the pit of panic.  Fates of MH137 and MH17 infiltrates logical thinking.  My positive outlook and glass half full attitude were shying away to the back seat.  Still I muster everything in me not to panic as I logically think that no one else was panicking around me.  I think maybe just maybe ‘flight tracker’ should/could tell me more.  Thankfully it did.  The flight was delayed approximately by one hour.  Sigh of relief.

The emotions start all over again once the passengers start to arrive.  I am regular at airport pickup as my husband travels a lot for work.  Also, I always offer to pick friends, relatives, exchange students (Just those who are going to stay with me).  It always feels the same.  They are never the first ones to come out.  I start to wonder if mum was having issues at customs or quarantine.  More at quarantine, if she has brought some food item that is not allowed in Australia.  We always joke that bringing drugs into our country might be easier than bringing some fruit.  Fellow Aussies think about it a kilo of drugs vs a kilo of bananas?  I share this joke in a hushed voice to the guy sitting next to me to kill time.

Finally I see a familiar face and a familiar load of luggage. Mum doesn’t believe in travelling light.  I hug her tight with relief.  I didn’t even comment on her luggage.

 

https://dailypost.wordpress.com/prompts/patience/

 

 

Posted in Daily post

Mumma!!! I just killed a Cactus…

cactus

If Freddie Mercury has seen my garden before he sang Bohemian Rhapsody his lyrics could have been about a dead cactus rather than him declaring to his mother about killing a man.

You know how they say certain family traits skips a generation.  Well it certainly did when it came to my gardening skills.  Well a few more things could be added to that, sewing, knitting and other artistic skills.  My mother is a queen of all trades and I am master of none.  My mum has the ability to grow things out of nothing while I manage to kill a fully grown plant.

I am scientist’s daughter and I believe that I am trying to prove Charles Darwin’s theory of “survival of the fittest” in my garden.  Time to time I experiment which ones can survive the longest without water etc.  Of course there are casualties in this experiment.  Yes as per my heading suggests, I did kill a cactus.

I have rearranged Freddie’s song and my version as follows.  Sorry for all “Queen” fans if you find this appalling.  I love him too.  But seriously he was a musical genius but completely out of his mind.  I believe my lyrics makes more sense.

 

Is this the real life
Is this just madness
Caught in a heatwave
No escape from sun
Can’t Open my eyes
I Look out the curtains and see
I’m just a poor gardener, Please I need sympathy
Because plants are easy come, easy go,
Little water, no water
Anyway the hot wind blows, doesn’t really matter to me – to me

Mama, I just killed a cactus,
I didn’t put a gun against it’s head,
I didn’t Pull the trigger, but it’s dead,
Mama, spring has just begun,
But now I’ve gone and thrown it all away
Mama, ooo,
Didn’t mean to make you ashamed
I will be back again this time tomorrow
To Carry on, carry on, as if gardening matters

Too late, time has come,
For the cactus with the spines
It’s hot all the time,
Goodbye all the dead plants – sorry you got to go –
you all left me behind and to face the truth
Mama, ooo –
I don’t want to kill my plants,
I sometimes wish I’d never had a garden at all –

I am just a poor girl no plant seems love me

(ok I am going to miss the next verse it’s the one with “Gallileo, Gallileo”, it’s too crazy to decipher even after a glass of gin)

So you think you can shame me and wither right in front of my eye
So you think you can love me and leave me to die
Oh Cactus – why did you do that to me
You got me to be the worst Gardner of the year

Nothing really matters
Anyone can see
Nothing really matters, nothing really matters – to me

………

Not true, The Garden matters to me, but not matter enough for me to wither in the scorching sun.  And sometimes I take the time to water them and apparently, I’ve stifled the plant with too much water.  Excuse me, I can’t seem to win.

I don’t ask for sympathy but maybe a bit of empathy.

 

 

 

https://dailypost.wordpress.com/prompts/sympathize/

https://dailypost.wordpress.com/prompts/stifle/

http://www.lyricsmode.com/lyrics/f/freddie_mercury/mamma_lyrics.html

 

Posted in Daily post

The Word Patina..what evokes?

Working from home can sometimes be a bit challenging.  It demands discipline at a time procrastination wants to raise it’s ugly head.  My fingers seem to wander off opening all other tabs – Facebook, email and abc news.  I like to stop there as delving into them is usually a very short stop.  Sometimes I would open up WordPress as well. And the worst one is Korean Dramas.  I don’t like the last two tabs as I know it’s not going to be a short stop.  Today is one of those days.  Work seems to be  wandering faraway, but it’s okay the deadlines aren’t here yet too.  As my son and I sometimes joke  “if it’s not the due date then it’s not the do date”.

I normally write at night, after I have done my days dues.  It’s my guilty pleasure, my small treat.  Not today, I have decided to take a day off, maybe not the whole day but at least a few hours off to do some reading and writing.

Work is important as it pays the bills.  But leisure is important because it gives a worthwhile reason to work.  That’s my excuse for today anyway.

I peek at the word prompts on wordpress and ponder which word, which subject takes my fancy.

Patina –  Evokes the memories of my Old English master.  He wasn’t our school teacher but an external Tutor the nuns recruited for the boarders.  He was tall and huge.  I particularly remember the tiny glasses that sat on the edge of his nose.

My passion and advancement for the English language was molded by mainly Four individuals.  My dad – he introduced me to many classics, Rudyard Kipling’s “Just So Stories” was one of them.  Needless to say that’s what I read as bedtime stories to my kids.  My dad introduced me to another old relative, not sure how he was related to us, that was Mr Ganeshan.  He was amazing at picking an unusual word and describing it with gusto.  So he was my second mentor.  The third was this Old English Master.  He was an imposing figure and we were meek and humble in front of him.  Many hated his vocabulary lessons.  But the nerd in me welcomed his lessons.  Patina was his word.  Before I ponder away into memories and let you wonder who the forth mentor was.  Well it’s my hubby.  Until I met him I read many books, but mainly romance.  I didn’t mind detective stories and yes Sherlock Holmes was on the list.  Hubby introduced me to a whole different world.  Never in a million years would I have read books such as “Hunt for red October”  or the Borne series.  Not my cup of tea would have been my answer.  But he encouraged me and said just read the first chapter and give up if you still don’t like it.  Mentors come in all shapes and sizes.

PATINA – bellows out our master – a pause and the word repeated again.  Dictionaries aren’t allowed to be open until we’ve been told so.  I had no idea what it meant.  No one did, I was eagerly waiting for his explanation while some had already moved on to daydream.  He points us to the St Joseph’s Bronze Statue that dominates the room.  “The green stuff on the bottom, that’s Patina”.  Huh! what an anti climax.  That’s just mere oxidation.  He went onto explain how and when you would use that word in normal conversation.

I was young then, I didn’t think further than that about that word since then.  But seeing it on the list here, it did evoke old memories and new musings.

Memories of my dad – movies, songs, books, studies, humanity, my dad had a hand in all of that. Even him introducing Mr. Ganeshan was all part of his grand plan.  It appears that there is a film of Patina still lingering over the silhouette of my body, the untimely death of my dad, life lessons learnt after his passing, no amount of polishing seems to remove the stubborn patina.

I wonder if we are meant to cherish the Patina, rather than remove it, as if it’s a foreign body. Why not celebrate the multitude of colours as a symbol of  life, age, history, memories and lessons learnt.

 

 

https://dailypost.wordpress.com/prompts/patina/

https://dailypost.wordpress.com/prompts/treat/

https://dailypost.wordpress.com/prompts/evoke/

https://dailypost.wordpress.com/prompts/dominant/

https://dailypost.wordpress.com/prompts/cherish/

https://dailypost.wordpress.com/prompts/silhouette/

Posted in Daily post, True Story, Inspirational

Just a mere Coincidence !?!…(part 2)

coincedence

“I remember my cousin telling me clearly, we’ll call you on the 19th and we can talk more.  How was I to know that he wasn’t going to keep that promise…”(Cont.. from part, I suggest that you read part 1 before you proceed.)

I am back at work after all the New Year celebrations.  It was the 7th of January, our office was relocating premises.  I was busy coding all the computers and its wires and extensions.  I was under the desk when the phone rang.  I just let it ring, as I wanted to get this done.  Sherrie who was at the reception popped in at the door and said “Uma why aren’t picking up the phone? it’s your mum on the line” Mum never rings me at work.  Immediately my thought goes to Arj my four year old, he was not the healthiest of kids.  I grabbed the the phone, mum started to slowly speak.  She said “Uma it’s not good news…” and she paused.  My mind starts racing and my hearts joins in too.  Mum continues “In Canada..Rama…”, I thought it was my uncle, she finishes the sentence.  My dear cousin had met with an accident and they believe he had passed away.

My racing heart came to a complete stop.  So did my mind.  It went blank.  Other than that one voice that just kept interjecting “No way, Not true”.  Brian my boss realised that something was wrong.  So did the others.  They made a cup of coffee and sat and talked me, they wanted to me to calm down before I started driving.

I start driving, I start planning my thoughts, I will go home and give a call to my sister in law to confirm the news.  This news came from other people not directly from the family.  They were still at the hospital as per the sources.  I was convinced he has somehow pulled through.  There was no way he could be gone.  No Way.  No Fricking way.  He is only forty years old, his wife/my buddy is only thrity five.  He has two small kids.  No Way, No He Can’t Go.  I just spoke to him to seven days ago.  No Way, Not True”. My mind kept chanting those words.

I am in one of the back streets.  I hear a big thud, I look through the rear view mirror.  A big Gum Tree branch just falls millimeters behind my car.  One millisecond earlier I would have been under that gum tree.  Same, same slightly different.  Force of the twins now attacking the kids?? Just a mere coincidence??  Maybe.

Between my cousin and me, I am the noisy one.  He was the calm, passive and quiet one.  He broke all those rules when he went.  He sent shook waves through the entire nation, the family and extended family. No one could fathom what had just happened.  But apparently that is life.

It just took one momentary lapse of concentration for that woman to drive through a red light and take out my cousin who was taking a left turn, to cause such carnage and misery. Some of us felt angry, some of us felt some kind of empathy but overwhelmingly all of us felt lost. I felt robbed.  I didn’t have a sibling of my own and even the one that I treated as my own brother was now taken.  I had to shun my emotions to soldier on Jan’s (my sister-in-law).  I hope God wasn’t listening to me then, if he was he was he would have rather shocked at the language I was using at him.  My personal observation here is that he screwed up well and truly on this case.

Time passed, his wife (my sister in law and friend) had accepted the sentence that ‘The Life’ gave her and of the sentence the court gave the other woman, the best way she can.  His kids grew with the remnants of the memories of their dad, and his parents struggled on, watching their grand kids to get a glimpse of their late son.  We blamed FATE for their destiny and moved on.

I had turned Forty the previous year in June.  So I was forty and six months on the 7th of January 2006.  I was on my way to my mum’s house with some essentials, bread, milk etc.  She was returning from Sydney that night and I wanted to put these things in her house before her arrival.  I was at the intersection waiting to turn right ( For those from the Americas, this would be like taking a Left turn for you), the lights change to green.  After a quick flick of the head to the right I start to move.  I hear someone’s horn, not sure which direction it came from. But there was a car coming at a speed from the right.  It all took just a split second.  I saw the other car driver right front of me.  I was sure I was gone that day, that very minute.  I felt jolt at the front, but the car drove off and I was still alive.

I was frozen for a few seconds.  I am not sure how I managed to brake in time, how/why the car behind me didn’t hit me.  I pulled into a side road to inspect the damage to the front of the car.  My number plate was screwed up.  That’s it nothing else.  Not another scratch.  But can you imagine how close the other car was if it had touched my number plate.

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Both cousin and I meeting with a similar accident on the 7th Jan and we were both at the exact age seems a little bit more than a coincidence to me.  Then again I don’t know if I am reading too much into it, to feel the connection between him and me.

I survived he didn’t, my uncle survived my dad didn’t.  Same, Same but different seems to be the theme in our lives.  It all has to be a mere coincidence.

The Universe is a one big question mark.  Do we have all the answers?  I guess in the scientific world most things can be rationalized as a mere coincidence and in the world of Mystic and spirituality it is Fate or a Miracle.  

 

Daily Prompt: Coincidence

https://dailypost.wordpress.com/prompts/coincidence/